Ode to Tom

When I first started exploring social networks, one of the things that troubled me was this fellow named Tom. At first I wondered who he was and how he assumed our friendship. It's not like we ever met or exchanged words.

Later I learned Tom was a default friend. Sad indeed. Yet Tom, with his menacing grin, seemed perfectly content. As it turns out, Tom is a rock. A connector. An innovator. Even a pioneer.

I had the rare opportunity to speak to Tom about what he's been up to.
This is how it went.

Me: Hey Tom, thanks for taking the time to speak with me.

Tom from MySpace: Ya, I got the restraining order. Uh, have we met?

Me: You did? Great. So tell me, what have you been up to? With the Myspace success and all.

Tom from MySpace: Mostly just working on MySpace.

Me: That's it?

Tom from MySpace: Ya. Keeps me busy.

Me: ...

Tom from MySpace: I did buy a new car recently.

Me: Ya? What'd ya get?

Tom from MySpace: It's a Scion. Ever seen one? It's wicked!

Me: ...

Tom from MySpace: And I've got this girlfriend now.

Me: Really? Where'd ya meet her?

Tom from MySpace: Where you think?

Me: Good talking to you.

And that was about it.
Shorlty after, I deleted him and took refuge in the Anti-Tom coalition.